And Then I Noticed
by The-Music-of-hands
Summary: And then I noticed. Her eyes crying for him, his love so incredible that he would let me have her. He had her around his neck. And I had none. x Third Part to And Then I Kissed Him x


Disclaimer: Only in my dreams could I come up with characters so good for each other...

_A/N_

_The third part--as I think FINALLY--to And then I kissed him. To read this, I suggest you read the previous two before reading this. Just trust me. I'm the author. (Can someone please enter a deranged laugh please?) I can't believe I decided to write a third. and for those who read the others, I should clear something up so it doesn't add to the confusion. In _

_"And then I kissed him" , Ann is the girl in Gray's past, Claire is barely in the story. not even making an appearance until way later. So, not to confuse, but main play is that Ann grew up in the city with Gray, her Mother died, she grew up, moved to the boonies, to a ranch/diner, like in the N64 version. (Where Doug and Ann run a ranch and an inn. Minus Gray as the brother.) _

_I really am sorry for the confusion as I can see where you guys kind of lifted your eyebrows and went "huh?"_

_Cast of Characters-_

_Gray_

_Ann_

_Cliff_

_And Jean Claire (Main girl who takes up the farm...She's in this one. _

_And now, the reveiwer that made this possible: Maykie, you told me to write another one and here you go. Now, you love me. _

_The reveiwers of the last two-in which you should read up on their stories as they are all amazing._

_Jean Cooper, The Scarlet Sky, TheMeltingBoy, Kuruk, HmGirly12, Ekoaleko, Kelly28, Fille de Myosotis, DoubleKK, Maykie, _

_Thank you all so much for this. I don't deserve it, really, I don't. (Laughs)_

_Enjoy,_

_The-Music-of-hands_

�

* * *

And Then I Noticed

* * *

I always wanted to fall in love. I guess you could say it was one of my dreams. When I was a kid, sure, I had a few girlfriends. Sure, I liked them. But I never liked them to the point where I was able to deal with them day and night. They were always so…girly, always so…feminine… They were always, exactly the same. After about ten of those kinds of girls, I finally put down the silver spoon and paper plate, and decided to wait for that one perfect person, the one person who was different from all the others. 

I think you can guess that because of my extended list, I was single for a very long time. Instead, I concentrated on literature and getting my bachelors degree in the fine arts and Advanced World Literature. I met a couple girls, they weren't the same, but they just weren't…different enough. 

I wanted someone who would be willing to watch horror movies with me, and _not _cling onto my arm. I wanted a girl who _liked _to wear ratty jeans and no makeup. I wanted a girl who _didn't_ care about her face…but about her attitude. That was the kind of girl I wanted. And after years of waiting, after years of looking, searching, I found her. It's funny to think that I found her yelling at the pastor in some secluded town. She didn't like his outfit. And the candles set up in long rows on a shelf attached to the wall. She said that they were too…dressy, and that a church should feel like a homey place and not like a freaking posh party. And that's how we met, when she threw a candle at me…and it hit dead on. But, it's not like that encounter ended in a bad way; in fact, I got a free meal out of it as well, and let me tell you, she was a damn good cook. 

Well, by the second month, I was pretty infatuated. It wasn't like she was the most beautiful girl there was, and it wasn't like she was a sweet and dainty thing. She was herself, brash, rude, sarcastic to the extreme, and always had her own opinions. But, under all of that, under her smiles, and punk rock, there was something hidden, a secret perhaps, maybe some kind of event that she had never let go of. It never worried me though. She was always happy to see me, and I happy to see her. 

I tried various ways to ask her, you know, various things, and then one day, we were just sitting there, sipping black coffee—because we drank all the cream earlier—and then she just kind of kissed me, I guess. It wasn't some romantic embrace, full of heated passion and the what-not; it was more of a simple whisper, some kind of sign that said _'I love you'. _

Now I know that's not true. I didn't really see the signs, I just saw what I wanted, she really didn't love me, and she wanted to have the love of someone else. Day after day, I would look at her and see that smile, her grey/Blue eyes twinkling as we shared an ice-cream cone, or ended up with cleaning the church. She whispered small little things in the dark when we were alone, just sitting there contemplating the future. Saying everything but 'I love you' because she couldn't. And, who could blame her for not being able to let go. Let go of everything she lived for, let go of the love she had been holding onto for years, how could she let go of herself? How could she let go of the heart that she promised to keep? And somehow, even though repeated myself everyday,

_I _love you… I _love _you… I love _you_…

I still…

I guess I just didn't mind. Whether I thought she was going to come around or what. 

So…

I did the next best thing. I asked her to marry me. It was all traditional, red roses, candles, champagne, and even though she was smiling kissing the corners of my mouth and practically shouting 'yes I will', I still thought… _Someone already has her…_

I mentally slapped myself. She was over it, anyone could tell how she was smiling so widely and kissing me so tenderly. Anyone could tell, everyone could tell…

Except for me…

Denial. My habit, my bad, bad, bad habit. It was like smoking, or drinking or dealing pot in the dark corners of an alley. I was hiding obvious denial right under my eyes. 

And so was she. 

Her grin when I'd come for a drink and she'd swing that braid right over her shoulder, telling me to visit her room, giving me harsh heated kisses, wanting to forget, forget about a promise. Or when I could just tell when she was thinking about him because that chain around her neck would be held so tenderly, so softly, it broke my heart. Us both denying the obvious...

It broke my heart knowing, thinking, just learning that…she was never mine to begin with. It's still breaking my heart, knowing that she can never really have mine. I was�there standing, on the alter, my breath just hitching into asthmatic gasps just thinking that in a matter of seconds we would be married, in a matter of years, we'd have a house, kids, each other. She walked down the carpet, holding a small bouquet of simple white flowers in her hands, her face between misery and happiness. Damn if she wasn't trying to forget.

We all knew she was. 

But she couldn't. Not here, not now (Not ever)

She walked right up, specks of tears in her eyes, her smile widening getting bigger and bigger every step she took. She was forcing happiness, everyone could see it. _Denial…_

It didn't take a long time for me to stop denying the obvious. 

She walked right up, stood in front of the pulpit. Her eyes not on me, never on me, but on him, I could see him, my best friend just standing there, so absorbed, so fallen…so…heartbroken. Heartbroken for her. And I didn't pretend to deny the obvious. I didn't pretend to deny her gaze at him while her fingers intertwined around the chain surrounding her neck. I put my arms around her neck, I tried to comfort her. Leaning in, I managed my best smile—_Denial_—and whispered softly into her ear. 

"_My Heart for yours"_

It wasn't a statement, it was a question. And as she started to stare at Gray, and then as she started to heave big wet sloppy tears, I knew the answer to the question. 

The Pastor asked the question and in-between sobs while staring directly at Gray, I was certain so certain that she would say no. 

"_I…"_

The Pastor asked again, and I could barely stop from choking up, heaving big tears of my own. What if she really did love me? _Denial…_

I smiled anyway, and then spotted Gray out of the corner of my eye, staring sullenly at the floor and wiping his eyes. As if anyone _didn't _know. 

"_Ann, do you take Cliff as your husband?"_

I looked at her; she sniffled, smiled and looked at me. _Denial…denial…denial…_

"_I do…"_

A tear slipped down Gray's cheek, and I saw a chain peeking out of his pocket, worn down, but nonetheless. He had her heart. I had none. 

And then I noticed. Her eyes crying for him, his love so incredible that he would let me have her. He had her around his neck. Why would they need me, if they already had each others hearts? The question was…

Would I deny the obvious?

"_Cliff, do you take Ann as your wife?"_

I looked at all of their faces, looked at Ann, looked at Gray, looked at Jean Claire, sitting in the back, staring at me as if I was breaking her heart. _(I was…)_

The third wheel did not belong. 

I do not belong.

"_I… I'm sorry. I can't."_

Ann burst into tears, and Gray looked up, staring at me like I had gone mad. Jean Claire let herself wipe away a tear on her face. Ann clutched my arm, fingering the chain with her other hand. I let a tear escape. Why not?

"_Why? Did I do something wrong?"_

I took a deep breath, wishing that I could just run away, leaving them to the answers left behind. Nope. No running. Just me and the truth…

I pointed at Gray.

"_He's got you wrapped around his neck Ann, and you've got him! Why else would I say no if I knew that if I said yes, then I would break the heart of the girl I love!"_

I smiled at Gray, he couldn't do anything. Ann fell down, I let Gray help her up. And then, with one last look at Ann and Gray, I kept my gaze forward running into Jean Claire. 

And now two month's later, I'm standing here looking out of my apartment, without a job, without a care, without a heart. 

Jean Claire's standing beside me, her hair up in a messy bun, writing silently in a notebook. 

A rhyme plays again and again in my head, and I smile at the childishness of it all. And then I notice that I broke the promise to myself. _I had one look at Ann and Gray, Took Jean Claire, and Ran away…._

A sting invades my chest as I see Gray and Ann clasping hands in my head. 

_No Running…_

Jean Claire shuts her notebook, rests her head on my shoulder…

I ran. 


End file.
